Harrieta
that's me in case you're wondrin
7/28/67 - The Day it all began
I saw her today, Margaret...
as youthful as ever, of course
how could she not be, she is margaret...
after all
its been 4 years since she left New York for that boy in California, I still missed her,
naturally
but when I was in my garden, I saw her again but something seemed different about her
when I saw her...
something I couldn't place
her hair wasn't quite so shiny
her eyes not as hopeful
her shirt stained and pants ripped
"I worry for that girl" my mother once said of Margaret
when she came back today, she had a pin of green carnation on her sweater, I was unsure what it meant
but as I looked at it, I remembered our first kiss under the archids in the park all those years ago, hiding from our parents
Me and Margaret
My garden was meant to be my escape from both present and past,
but,
here she was, and so like a lover, reunited at last, I chased after her, but she ran, oh how she ran, she ran into those dastaryly woods, the woods without love or remorse or shame, and like the fool I am, I followed her, I would follow her anywhere, as should you, but once I caught up to her, she was gone, all that remained were some feathers and blood, I heard a squak as her body contorted into a dove, a shot rang out and the dove fell too,
I looked for who had sent the silent bullet, but there was nobody there but I, and I held no gun, I had buried it long ago in the garden
I ran out of those woods and washed my hands ever so carefully
They could never know what happened there
I grabbed the feathers off the soft earth and burned them with my letters from her, for all those years we had chatted in her absence
I had a husband and a son to worry about now, no time for old girls and their games, no time for the whims and vices of youth
it's 1967, the nation's at war, there are more important things than her
there has to be
right?
I did what I had to do,
when I
I can't say it,
when I did it...
When I shot her when I found her
for trying to drag me away again
he still needs me, and I need him
